Hello My Name is ________ and I am a child of the ONE TRUE KING

Jordan was the inspiration of this song. 

Jordan was left at a drug rehab after being kicked out of college. He felt worthless. His parents didn’t know what to do and did the best they could for him. All of our parents tried to do the best they could for us. Yet, this world is wounded and wounded people will wound their children. We’ve all been hurt by those who left when they should have lingered, who hit when they should have held, who yelled when they should have yielded, who lied when they should have led, who have cheated when they should have been committed, who have tolerated when they should have treasured…. That wounding leaves us all feeling WORTHLESS. Worthless means less than the value of being human in my heart and mind.

Here’s the thing … the glorious truth…. We are not defined by anyone or their actions. They are all feeling worthless and doing worthless actions revealing who they are. It reveals who we are when we do the same…. The voices and lies do not define us unless we let them.

The entire world may not know this word…… floccinaucinihilipilification but I knew it most of my life it was the skin I worse for close to 45 years … with unconditional love that label has changed to “accepted in the beloved” ….. Eph 1:6 …… a challenge to your thinking cap sure. Yeah I had to google right there myself  when I discovered it as well.

Here’s the thing .. and I am going to skip formality of grammar and just lay it out … .. it’s a huge huge word …it is usually used just for the curiosity of knowing a very long word… but truthfully ..this word is the mountain that most can’t climb… I would look at that mountain daily and I can tell you …. … feeling worthless is one of the biggest faith wreckers in life…. We can’t do much for good and for God feeling worthless. We have no fountain to love others from…… BUT HEY….. hey!    Wait…… God has said we are priceless ….. he loves us unconditionally….. even SIN doesn’t interrupt his love Romans 5:8 so… as his children …..

Feeling worthless (like nothing) causes us to do nothing….. and doing nothing will cost you everything….

Regret said this to Restoration….. “Because you don’t know the future, have faith in GOD who loves you like crazy and has already seen you in your future……..  Trust the love of GOD beyond reason even when you don’t “feel” like it. Know that you are so valuable he gave the most precious part of his glory he could give …. his life…. and became confined to a resurrected body for all eternity…. walk in that …. bathe in that …. be saturated with the power of the LOVE of GOD and let it beam from you to a world plunged in darkness that can’t find its way beyond feeling worthless even on its best day ….. Let GOD’s love flow from his amazing unending supply to and thru you to others as we all learn …. I John 4:18 truly “there is no fear in love”

If you want to know this love… contact me I’ll definitely share it with you.

Emerge a changed Woman.

My past is riddled with so many things, some drama, mistakes, pain, violence, sadness, divorce, marriage and death. I can’t begin to write all that I could say about it.  I guess I could fill this blog with it all so that you can identify with me on some of those points but lets shorten the drama to get to the heart of the matter.  Here’s the bottom line.

When I became saved I exchanged my life for the new life of Christ. I became a new creature, not the old person reinvented but a new creation. The problem wasn’t in my salvation not being all it should have been or being more complete. God just doesn’t do a half-baked job. My problem was that I came to the table with years of past rejection that had trained my mind to be rejected. Short story, I grew up with tons of rejection from my dad, married a man who rejected me, then made a series of poor judgments trying to be accepted in my career or by others so that I would mask the pain of being rejected. Something had to change and I spent the last 6 years trying to figure it out.

None of the avenues I tried worked because at the end of the day I was still the same rejected person. I finally found the answer when I was faced for the first time in my life with having to make it on my own without props. (people to support me emotionally) I started studying the WORD of GOD rather than talk or write about what I had thought I had known of His Word. Truth was that “religion” had gotten in the way of having a real understanding of who GOD is and of my identity in Christ. I began to dig and what I found out has accomplished in my life what it should have done. I have had to be changed from the inside out by renewing my mind.

When we get saved we as stated by the Lord are new creatures, all things have passed away behold all things have become new. That being said, I did get saved but never ever really took concerted time to find out about my new life in Christ. I was trying to live out life the old me way vs. the mind of Christ way.

I understand going through the motions and being indifferent to life going around you. I understand just trying to survive the pain and toil of life but not living life. I call it survival mode. When God quickens (makes our spirit alive by becoming one with it, it is unmistakable.) He says our spirit witnesses with His Spirit. As a believer I did  not accept that change as normally as I should have and fought every step of the way. I tried in my flesh to do my thing when I see that now I can’t do anything but what the Lord wills, even then it’s all Him and not me. The first change I noticed is how I view things and how I began to unravel and learn a whole new way. It’s like going from black and white tv to color. So much more sense in the life around you because you see everything as a small puzzle piece in a huge masterpiece GOD is aware of.

Old southern preachers where I used to live would say “do you know that you know that you know?” I think of the phrase sometimes when I realize that GOD has redeemed my soul through his Son’s offering for my sin. My old man was crucified with Christ on that cross and has passed away. Sometimes in this life we keep giving the “Old Man” a funeral by holding on to the mind the old man had and not allowing the renewing the mind of the “new creation” to be like the Son.

 I am a new creation that as God says is “accepted in the beloved” The good work that God began in me he will continue as he promised. God has said to “come boldly” to his throne of Grace to receive Mercy in time of need. To take his burden because it is not weighty…. over and over the theme of the New Covenant is that GOD provided a way to Him that is fool proof, I like that term meaning even I can follow his lead.  Every step of the journey is made clear to us in His Word so that we can’t possibly do it, but that we can be successful letting Him do it. He changes us we can’t change ourselves. Wouldn’t we have changed us already if we could? If we struggle with something wouldn’t we wave the human wand at it and poof we are changed? Wouldn’t we provide our own healing? Are you hearing in my statements why “we” can’t do it?

 Where would dependence on GOD be if “we” could change ourselves. Immediately we would humanize it all and forget God. That is why Paul wrote the phrases about “the things I do I would not” etc. That is why the renewing of the mind is so important. You can’t do anything you don’t believe. You might try to pretend it, copy it, squeak, squak, sqawk like it but if you are a duck you are not a sheep. I lived so many self righteous, entitled years that way to the waste of time and talents, but I was blind now I see.

 The Good Shepherd leads the sheep they know his voice and follow him. Pretending only lasts for a season but sonship last for a life. The most wonderful part is GOD loves and is jealous of the “new creation” We are accepted by him, loved by him, wanted by Him, trusted by Him (to be His representative), seen as joint heirs with Jesus by him, I could continue to list them but our identity is in Christ in the eyes of the Father who has promised that we are seated in the heavenlies blessed with all spiritual blessings. When Christ is enough everything is enough. We are sheep following our Shepherd who leads us to all we need. The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not want.