Awesome Moment

Send the Rain Lord!

Listen to this video and let the LORD open your heart.

My precious Lord means the world to me. Navigating this life would be impossible without His Word and the Holy Spirit. I would die without Him. I’m so humbled by my weaknesses and my own inadequate way to convey what a precious glorious loving Father He is. Thankful is the weakest word sometimes. Truly He leads me every step of the way with His Word and with the prompting of the Holy Spirit. I am not talking about something spooky but just about praying, seeking His Word and about Him opening doors and giving me peace about those doors. I won’t do anything without the peace of God because I have learned that the price to pay without His peace is too high.

I love this video and the quotes that were used making it. Oh that we would be changed by the power of God that is not just a promise but a reality. My heart desires to change the world and to see people meet my LORD and know the fullness of his love. Father let me give and make a difference and to love deeply with reckless abandon and give out and burn out for a love I have found that is greater than my life…love that rescued me from the pit of despair to a seat in the heavenlies that can never be shaken or taken. Dear ones you are defined by what binds….. be free lambs. Open your hands and receive what God has given you right before your eyes so that you can say God is good to God be the glory. His heart is to take you from grace to glory.

If my world can be so rocked by pain I know we all need to heal. I know beyond a shadow of doubt our country will heal when our people in the pew get healed. We soldier so wounded we miss the voice of God. …. revival is here if we want it but we have to let GOD rain in our hearts. We can’t keep acting it out we have to have it flow out from within. He is the power of the resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings should make it clear to us. We have to bring our darkness to the LIGHT so it can be exposed and so that HE can change us. He wants to heal, transform and restore. Let God be true and every man a liar. Stop telling yourself who God is and listen for once to who He is. Faith comes by hearing. Open the Word and see the character of God. Hear who HE is. We can’t change ourselves. Going through the motions only wastes precious time until the real living begins.
If we could heal ourselves why on earth did he come to heal the brokenhearted and set the captives free….wouldn’t heaven have been a nicer place to stay???
This lamb is weak and needs healing in some areas….. I admit that I need the rain in my life…. the fire the wind the Holy Spirit in power to be all that God promised and witness to the world HIS great grace and love. I stink at being rejected. I hurt and cry and clamor like a little broken lamb but my Savior was rejected and despised the shame but endured the cross for my sin so that I never have to be rejected by Him. Heb 12:2
Who am I to ever pitch a fit because of rejection or not getting my way. I am a spoiled brat needing my Lord who cares more about my character than my comfort.

Dear Ones it’s time to get down to God’s business and open our hands to let go of what we cling to so that God can fill them with what is dear to his heart….. so we can heal and be the light to the world that we are intended to. It’s time to get under sound doctrine and solid leadership so that we can grow. Help us not stay in our comfort zone but stretch us and mold us. Healthy things grow.

Dear GOD bless my enemies, bless those who left when they should have lingered, who hit when they should have held, who yelled when they should have yielded, who lied when they should have led, who have cheated when they should have been committed, who have tolerated when they should have treasured. God for their sake bless them and curse them not. God restore what they have taken and what they have lost by missing you in the storms and temptation, by hearing their own voice louder than yours, by clinging to fear instead of faith when you wanted to pour your blessing on them and their hands were too full. Oh my Father help me remember when I am like them to run to you and please forgive me as well. I know Lord and humbly I say thank you for bearing long with me and please pave my road with bricks of grace and mercy…… Dear GOD heal our land as we humbly pray and seek your face … heal our hearts … and GOD show us a better way. Dear Father I plead with you that we get out of the way and let your will be done.

Forgive us LORD and lead us to revival so that the world may know freedom and truth. Help us remember it’s all in and through you we have our being. In Jesus name amen….

Blow out on I-30 GOD never promised a Flat LIFE.

We had just left a beautiful scenic harbor heading back to my apartment. I had friends with me in a 2 car caravan and suddenly the vibration in my car became severe and we all heard a loud pop. My rear tire had blown. If you know anything of Dallas you know on an interstate this could be deadly. I calmly pulled the car to the side of the road and proceeded to figure out what to do next. Unfortunately the lugs were torqued too tight and three grown men couldn’t get them off. We are talking hefty men standing on the lug wrench, using 4 ways and cheater bars. I decided to send some of my guest to my apartment and keep them out of harms way using the second car.
One bent lug wrench and 2 hours later we waited on the police to help us get off the highway. All the plans for the evening were changed. It was close to midnight before the police finally came. They were great following me as I drove my poor car to my home which was 1/4 mile from the blow out. It was more than ironic that I was almost home and could see my front door across the interstate. So much went through my mind as I thought about my guest and hoped they all were ok and not too disturbed by the events.

The next day a guy came over with a breaker bar and 19mm socket and with great ease he loosened the lugs. I had soaked them overnight in WD40 but he credited the success with having the right tools.

Here’s the parallel I drew in my mind. I was almost home but the blow out challenged my journey. I could see my destination.  I couldn’t get there because I had an unexpected storm and was not adequately prepared for it. I had tools that were tucked away for such a day but they were inadequate and I had no experience using them since I had purchased this car. They were cheap, used improperly (we broke a 3/8 socket wrench and bent the lug wrench) and the wrong choice for the job. Isn’t life like that? We go off with the wrong tools and when the storm comes we are ill-equipped to handle it. It was very dangerous in Dallas on I-30 that night. Cars flew by as I stood there on the highway. Each tool failed and we were all still stranded.

God has promised to equip us for this journey. The best way to be prepared is to know him intimately by His Word and His Spirit. I can’t overstate the value of staying under the influence of the Word. It will be the tool that sustains you on days where a blow out changes everything. Things in life will cause a change in direction but not destination. I could clearly see the finish line, my front door but the tools I had to get there wouldn’t work and I had to accept an alternative route. The truth is useless unless it changes you. Use the truth you have been given to help you when a blow out in life  occurs so you won’t be stranded waiting on someone or something to help you out. Accept that there might be another way so that you are open to leading and teaching when the way you have isn’t working.

When God ran to me

Reposted from 2008 in honor of all God has called son who have fallen in this world but still are loved by a Father whose love is perfect. A Father who ran down that long road to meet them and said my son has come home again! Happy Father’s day Sir.

When GOD ran to me. Click here to listen

Luke 15:11-24 A

11And he said, A certain man had two sons:

12And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living.

13And not many days after the younger son gathered all together, and took his journey into a far country, and there wasted his substance with riotous living.

14And when he had spent all, there arose a mighty famine in that land; and he began to be in want.

15And he went and joined himself to a citizen of that country; and he sent him into his fields to feed swine.

16And he would fain have filled his belly with the husks that the swine did eat: and no man gave unto him.

17And when he came to himself, he said, How many hired servants of my father’s have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger!

18I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee,

19And am no more worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants.

20And he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him.

21And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son.

22But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet:

23And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry:

24For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found. And they began to be merry.

This story has a very significant meaning in my life. I did pack up all I had and run from GOD. I didn’t live riotously but I did waste my substance. I spent all I had physically, emotionally, and spiritually and was left desolate. For a season I lived beneath the calling GOD had placed in my life at salvation, the calling we all have to be salt and light to the world. You all know what I am talking about. I am talking about the kind of living we do waiting on living to happen. The kind of self absorbed reckoning with our lives at the cost of being right with GOD.

Whatever is in your life that is distracting you or keeping you from dealing with your “swine trough” is a stronghold.  That swine trough could be pride that keeps you from forgiving someone, it could be doing a “work for the LORD” that is nowhere near God’s plan for your life. It could be a trough of indecision or the game of “waiting on the LORD” Where did GOD say to wait on him and do nothing while waiting? I see myself so much in the statements above. This prodigal got to the point he felt he was no longer worthy to be called his father’s son. Have you ever said these words? God I am not even sure I am saved and I doubt I am your child because I am here in my pig trough belly aching when I could be at your table. WAKE UP folks we can’t do this long and not feel like swine and degenerate despots.  We can’t run from a holy and just GOD and feel nothing or expect no conviction. When we neglect to face our issues we create a reality that very far from real. Human nature can justify almost any action but there is a clear and true standard that answers most of our questions in dealing with almost any situation. That standard is God’s Word. Our hearts are wicked and will deceive every chance they get.

Can you imagine the scene? I am going to paint this picture for you in modern times using a modern situation. Imagine a woman coming down a long road after being ravaged by divorce from a 20 year first marriage when she had served God with all that she knew how. Then to be followed by a precious second relationship  that failed because of disobedience to God’s Word. Finally to move out of her comfort zone  to total devastation in a city far away from all she knows and loves.  She has done all she can do and knows to do to try to make it in this world. Her heart is broken and she doesn’t even feel worthy to be a daughter of such a Father. A Father who she thought at one time considered her worthy to be His child. In her mind she is thinking any closeness I can have to Him even to be His servant on the outside of the family is better than what I have sought in the pleasures in this world. She feels unlovable, rejected, and torn to pieces. She feels no hope out there where the prince of the world is Satan. Her heart divides her each choice she makes because she is not whole, healed, or able to decide what is right anymore.

Slowly she begins to read about her Father’s love, care, compassion, sacrifice, and understands that is where it all should rest. She doesn’t place her confidence in those who pull you into the swine trough any longer.  She is remembering as David often did in the Psalms of God’s goodness even when people you love make terrible mistakes that hurt you. She begins to read her Father’s Words with passion seeking jewels of his grace, guidance, mercy, love, and understanding as well as righteousness. Her head lifts and she prays earnestly to the only hope she has in this life. Father, I have sinned, I have taken your grace and disgraced so much with my life with fear, doubt, and directing my own steps.  Her prayer is a long road, but she is not left journeying that distance alone. When the Father sees her heart is broken HE begins to run to her. As each prayer she prays indicates her total surrender His steps pick up even faster. He takes her to his chest and shouts to those around to begin to celebrate. He clothes her with his clothes, not the clothes she was wearing in the world. Her prayer ends where it should have began, in the arms of GOD. He restores her to the status that she had before she fell. He restores her to the heir and daughter she was.

The point of this story is of course that I am that woman. The other more important point is that through prayer and God’s word I was able to stop being her and by HIS grace learn my Father’s heart for me by His Word. I know folks tell you all the time to read the Word. We think a few minutes on Sunday when the preacher gives a message is enough to last all week. I am telling you not reading the WORD and praying daily is spiritually going to starve you and make you weak for hard times. Life is hard but GOD is good and we will lose sight of that if we neglect knowing Him intimately by reading the WORD. Begin today to know the heart of GOD by reading HIS love to you in written form and accepting His love demonstrated to you in the Cross of Christ. Email me if you want to know more. Blessings 🙂

Create in me a clean heart, My sin.

Create In Me a Clean Heart by Keith Green click here to listen.

I love the passage of Scripture that this song is based on. Psalms 51 I think verse 4 stands out to me. As I write and try to share my story I try to say things that are generally uplifting but there are times when I have to be real looking at myself. It would be easy to always let you see victory in my life but then if you looked beyond the praise you would see a person who is different than you read here in this blog. I am living in Christ victoriously but also like everyone, I sin. This is one of those hard post because it’s me just as I am behind the praise. I am seeking God’s will and was convicted about sin.

David had sinned with Bathsheba and it was pointed out to him. Psalms 51 was written after his adultery had been revealed. I watched the anatomy of his confession and see in this deep understanding of God’s character. The focus is not the adultery but the fact that any action that crosses the threshold of temptation to violate a holy, just, and merciful God is indeed sin.

I would love to say I never sin but that in of itself would be a sin. I would love to say nothing ever gets me down but again that would be a lie and you are getting the gist of what I am saying. I can’t justify my actions. I have recently been dealing with something and had come to a couple of realizations. I will only delve into one here. I am being tested. What I want to deal with in this post is my sin and God’s will. This particular time of sin happened several years ago. I can’t say at the time I didn’t know I was sinning, I did. I was surviving by rationalizing my actions. I am not going to go into what I did because it really doesn’t matter. Disobedience to God is disobedience to God. With sin it’s a most sizes fit all proposition. The bottom line is my sin was against a just, holy, God who has redeemed my soul. Because I did it willingly I did not feel Godly sorrow over it. I thought it was heinous that I couldn’t feel repentant. I was basing my life on what I was seeing around me at the time and a lot of people were naming the name of Christ doing the same thing. Does that negate my responsibility? IN NO WAY! I knew better, and I sinned anyway. I recently have had to deal with my transgression and seek the LORD to create a clean heart in me. I really want to love and serve my LORD with my whole heart. I can’t do that with a heart that is not clean and receptive to His leading. Whatever I cling to, whether it be sin, relationships, past or future fear, all of it gets in the way of His plan. I see my relationship to Him as the most powerful love of my life. Sinning against Him hurts me in many ways and He is clear about my sin in His Word. You would have to see where he brought me from to understand why the love of Christ constrains me. I want you to know that you have to deal with things to grow and heal. I had confessed other things to GOD since this sin but not this one. I think pride was part of it, and also denial. When I moved to Dallas, God orchestrated a lot of things in my life to heal me and draw me close to Him. How could a gal who loves the LORD so much do something so bad? How could I be digging into Scripture and prayer and not have told GOD I was sorry for my wrong doing. Why didn’t it bother me daily, why am I now dealing with something that happened years ago. I think it was that I had to see myself as sinful as I was and because of all the brokenness, I couldn’t see it and take care of it. I spent time in prayer seeking the LORD about another matter when it hit me head on. I had sins that had never been addressed. I spent today reflecting, repenting, and receiving forgiveness. Why would I write that here? For sure it’s humbling, but at the same time, there may be a reader who is struggling, who has something in their past that they think is so far past that it doesn’t matter. Maybe a lot has happened to them and their life is hard and they think that there is so much packed way down there is no hope. I don’t know what your story is, but I do know the answer is always to take these things to God. To me today it mattered. First when I realized it I saw myself in need of the only GOD who can forgive sin. I ran to Him. Secondly, it showed me how fragile my life is and how carelessly I can be with it and days can turn into years. Thirdly, and this is the one that brings tears, I am more free by the Truth of God’s WORD that says who I am in CHRIST as I face who I was. Freedom in CHRIST is priceless. It can’t be bought or sold. His Truth sets us free and reveals His character so that we can grow more like Him. .. Wretched sinner that I can be from grace to glory to glory. I love HIM! I am in awe that only HE can take us from disgrace to grace.

Psalms 51: 1Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions. 2Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. 3For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me. 4Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight: that thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest. 5Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me. 6Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom. 7Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. 8Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice. 9Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities. 10Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. 11Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me. 12Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit. 13Then will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee. 14Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, thou God of my salvation: and my tongue shall sing aloud of thy righteousness. 15O Lord, open thou my lips; and my mouth shall shew forth thy praise. 16For thou desirest not sacrifice; else would I give it: thou delightest not in burnt offering. 17The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise. 18Do good in thy good pleasure unto Zion: build thou the walls of Jerusalem. 19Then shalt thou be pleased with the sacrifices of righteousness, with burnt offering and whole burnt offering: then shall they offer bullocks upon thine altar.

Encouragement from my beautiful daughter.

(my daughter sent this email to me and I hope it encourages all who might read here.) I read this again today … what a priceless treasure.

Dear Mom,

I kinda understand what you are going through there at work.  It’s hard to live in a secular environment, be criticized for faith, and still remain positive. 

I hope I can encourage you with what I have learned here.

I now feel like I understand what is meant by “The Truth shall make you free.”  I go to classes where no one believes in absolute Truth.  I find though that it is not discouraging or limiting.  It is freeing in the sense that I know the Truth, and regardless of what people think of me or believe about me falsely, I am free in Christ.  I am free to be able to hold my beliefs regardless of what society says.  I can see clearly how postmodernism has become a prison for people because they are trapped in trying to explain the world and events without fully understanding the whole picture. 

I know you may not be experiencing this as I am.  However, I think some themes here are similar.  I know that no matter what happens that I am secure in my faith and in my God.  I have Truth on my side.  I have God on my side.  I have security regardless of what happens with the economy or school in knowing that He will take care of me.  These facts give me confidence.  I feel that there is no reason to be sad or worried or fearful.  Those aren’t from God.  Those are things that come to attack us and make us think that God isn’t in control or on our side.  I can’t explain enough how good it is to know I serve a BIG God, not a tiny one, a dead one, a confused one; but a GREAT BIG GOD that is all-powerful, and all-knowing.  It gives me confidence and that is where I draw my strength. 

I understand its hard to keep going in the face of adversity, especially at work or school where our lives are literally lived.  However, God wants you to know that he supports you and is “keeping” you in his perfect Grace.  He is BIG and can handle whatever people may say to you or do to you.  Just live for Him and in light of His grace.  He will take care of the rest. 

I could go on and on here because I really get it now, but I hope that in some small way you can feel encouraged knowing that others are going through the same types of struggles, you are not alone, and regardless of what people are around you God is always there.  He identifies with us in a way that no one else does.  He asked Saul on the road to Damascus why he was perscuting Him.  God said “ME” meaning that when people speak wrongly against you or bring evil against you they are essentially doing it to Him.  That, I believe more than anything demonstrates our identity in Him.

When life gets hard, remember Who’s you are!

Love you!

Totally Disturbed! TY LORD

When I was a teacher I loved studying and teaching on the early pioneers in science, many of whom were strong in the faith. Sir Frances Drake wrote this poem that describes the passion I have for the LORD and for knowing HIM intimately. I can’t begin to praise the wonders of GOD who has shaken my life and molded it into such a beautiful rose. I have to add here just so that you know without being envious that my life is not perfect. It’s far from that. I planted myself 4 years ago in circumstances that I should have never entertained and now after much trial and refining by the master potter, I see that and allow the Holy Spirit to work in my life to mold me to HIS will and way. God had to disturb me from mere existence to life. ONLY GOD can do that for us. I pray daily for HIS will and way. HE is my breath and complete and utter dependence on HIM is all that I can base my life on. Day by day HIS grace reveals to me what HE desires through HIS love letter to me. HE is my lover, my friend, my everlasting eternal holy GOD. Oh, how I love HIM and ache for the day when this temporal disturbing life is over and I see HIM never more to be disturbed. Thirsting here in this life to want more because HE is all and I want all of HIM. Praise you Father for overhwhelming me with your love.

Disturb us, Lord, when
We are too well pleased with ourselves,
When our dreams have come true
Because we have dreamed too little,
When we arrived safely
Because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst
For the waters of life;
Having fallen in love with life,
We have ceased to dream of eternity
And in our efforts to build a new earth,
We have allowed our vision
Of the new Heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show your mastery;
Where losing sight of land,
We shall find the stars.

We ask You to push back
The horizons of our hopes;
And to push into the future
In strength, courage, hope, and love.

Sir Frances Drake, 1577

Psalm 100

1Make a joyful noise unto the LORD, all ye lands.

2Serve the LORD with gladness: come before his presence with singing.

3Know ye that the LORD he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.

4Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.

5For the LORD is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.

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